


Toothpaste

by Aria_Faye



Series: Stranger than Fiction [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Online Dating, Chatting & Messaging, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, based on actual events, nobody skates, normal people doing normal people things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-11
Updated: 2019-02-11
Packaged: 2019-10-26 02:37:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17737412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aria_Faye/pseuds/Aria_Faye
Summary: Apparently toothpaste can be a deal-breaker...





	Toothpaste

**Author's Note:**

> Another installment in the Aria's-Real-Life-As-Fanfiction saga! This actually happened. Enjoy the hilarity. And don't hate on my toothpaste habits too much.

Victor spilled into the back room at work with five minutes to spare. He pulled out his phone and, just for the hell of it, messaged Yuuri:

<< Marry me.

>>Okay! :D

Victor smiled so hard at his phone he thought his face might break.

“Something funny?”

With a jerk, Victor looked up at Mila, who wasn’t even looking at him. Just scrolling through something official-looking on the desktop on the other side of the room with a wry little grin on her face.

He held up his phone. “Yuuri.”

“Ah,” Mila said, like this explained everything.

And, even though she hadn’t asked for more, Victor’s mouth (with no input from his brain) continued, “Yuuri and I have this thing. Sometimes I message him and ask him to marry me. Since, once we meet—unless something goes horribly wrong—we plan on actually getting married. For real.”

Mila squinted up at him. “But what if he has some really awful habit?”

Victor blinked at her and said, “Like what?” (As if Yuuri could have any habits awful enough to be deal-breakers, he scoffed internally.)

Mila shrugged. “What if he squeezes toothpaste from the middle of the tube??”

For a long moment, Victor gaped at her. Then: “ _I_ squeeze toothpaste from the middle of the tube!”

“Oh my god,” Mila gasped. Like squeezing toothpaste in an apparently incorrect fashion was some kind of cardinal, punishable offense.

“What’s so wrong with that, anyway?” Victor demanded.

Mila just waved her hands around, saying, “Oh my god, Victor. If you have to ask—”

“Well it’s not like I’m planning on sharing my toothpaste anyway!” Victor countered. “He’ll have his own toothpaste!”

“Why?”

“Because I need special toothpaste! My gums bleed!”

“Oh my god.”

The door to the back opened and Yuri poked his head inside the small room. “Alright, the fuck’s going on back here?”

Mila spun around in the desk chair and looked at Yuri gravely. “Victor squeezes toothpaste from the middle of the tube.”

“Oh my fucking god.”

“What is the problem with that??” Victor sputtered at both of them. “I have never made a mess with toothpaste in my life!”

They both just shook their heads. “Oh my god,” Mila muttered again.

Victor sighed. Opened the messaging app.

<< You’re having your own toothpaste when we live together.


End file.
